Always an AkuRoku song fic
by bonkersbimbo
Summary: Axel loves Roxas but what happens when love gets complicated. songfic to song Always by bon jovi. contins death. please read and review


Disclaimer i don't own kingdome hearts. I tried to take axel and zexion but square enix stopped me.

Song belongs to bon jovi.

kingdom hearts songfic. song lyrics in Italics.

_This romeo is bleeding  
But you cant see his blood  
Its nothing but some feelings  
That this old dog kicked up_

Six months. Thats how long its been. Six months since i saw you laugh. Six months since you left me behind. Six months since i hit the bottle. Six months since you left me behind. Six months i have been dying inside. I stare at your picture the only one left.

"Roxas" my whisper echos into the night.

_Its been raining since you left me  
Now Im drowning in the flood  
You see Ive always been a fighter  
But without you I give up  
_

I think back to that if i had tried i could have saved you. I know why it happened. What started it all. When you visited me at work, you caught his eye. I was glad he liked you. If only i had realised what he wanted. Riku was my best friend. I thougt he would never try to hurt me. When he told me you reminded him of his childhood friend. I never thought anything of it. when he laughed at all your jokes i was glad to see him happy.

_  
Now I cant sing a love song  
Like the way its meant to be  
Well, I guess Im not that good anymore  
But baby, thats just me  
_

"I'm sorry Axel but I don't love you anymore. I'm in love with Riku" you turn to me with tear filled eyes

"Roxas"

I remember when you spoke those words to me. You broke my heart in two. I never thought i would heal. Everywhere i turned you both were together. It tore me up inside. Your smile never seemed as honest as before, your laughs more hollow.

_  
And I will love you, baby - always  
And Ill be there forever and a day - always  
Ill be there till the stars dont shine  
Till the heavens burst and  
The words dont rhyme  
And I know when I die, youll be on my mind  
And Ill love you - always_

When he first hit you in public i wanted to rip his arms off and shove them down his throat. Only two things stopped me. One was Zexion and Demyx holding me back, and two was you, you with eyes filled with tears and red sore cheek, pleading me, saying not to hurt him. I left again, not wanting to see you.__

Now your pictures that you left behind  
Are just memories of a different life  
Some that made us laugh, some that made us cry  
One that made you have to say goodbye  
What Id give to run my fingers through your hair  
To touch your lips, to hold you near  
When you say your prayers try to understand  
Ive made mistakes, Im just a man  


When I got home, I burned all the pictures of us. In a fit of rage I got rid of all your stuff. threw it in the bin, out the window. I didn't want to see any of it. Everytime it burned my heart. i wanted it to be over. thats when it called me. My christmas present from Riku, a bottle of whisky. How fitting, his present would be the one to make me forget. I opened the bottle and drank straight from it.

_  
When he holds you close, when he pulls you near  
When he says the words youve been needing to hear  
Ill wish I was him cause those words are mine  
To say to you till the end of time  
_

Every sip brought images of you both to my mind, it was toturing me,I soon had finished the bottle and felt better. This went on for about 2 weeks until you showed up a my door. The rain poured heavily and you we're soaked right came in and told me everything that had you still loved me. How Riku had threatened to hurt me if you never went to him. I cried as I held you close. I was never gonna let you go again. even if it killed me

_Yeah, I will love you baby - always  
And Ill be there forever and a day - always  
_

We lasted a week together before Riku showed back gun glinted in the sun. Everyone gasped. He raised his gun and pointed it directly at me.

"Axel you took him away from me. I loved him. how could you."

He had done it. Riku had finally snapped. There he stood proclaiming his love with kairi standing smuggly at his. bet she was loving this. The world seemed to move in slow motion as he pulled the trigger. I closed my eyes and waited for the impact. I t never came.

_  
If you told me to cry for you  
I could  
If you told me to die for you  
I would  
Take a look at my face  
Theres no price I wont pay  
To say these words to you  
_

I heard the cries and opened my eyes. My breath caught in my chest. you were there. at my feet. blood on your chest. I fell to my knees with tears in my eyes.

"Roxas....why"

"I couldn't let you. I love you Axel."

I gathered you in my arms as i held you close i whispered in your ear.

"please roxas don't leave me. I can't live with out you."

"you have to me. If i don't make iti want you to go on. please."

"I will Roxas."

I held you in my arms as the last breath left your body

_  
Well, there aint no luck  
In these loaded dice  
But baby if you give me just one more try  
We can pack up our old dreams  
And our old lives  
Well find a place where the sun still shines  
_

So here i am six months later. alone in my dark room with your photo. the only one that survived my rage. I can't move on. I tried but it was pointless. nothing worked. Alcohol was my only friend. I needed you. I can't function without you. I know that now. It was too much work. I wanted to see you gain. To hold you in my arms. There was only one way.

_  
And I will love you, baby - always  
And Ill be there forever and a day - always  
Ill be there till the stars dont shine  
Till the heavens burst and  
The words dont rhyme  
And I know when I die, youll be on my mind  
And Ill love you - always_

I looked at the bottle of pills in my hand. I always said I would see you in the next life. now we would see if that was true.I swallowed the bottle straight and lay sown with your picture in my arms. I swear I could see you crying beside my bed My hand went out to cup your face. You smiled as my hand went right through you. I sighed. Maybe next time we would last.


End file.
